Electile Dysfunction redux

A pagan/political listserv I am on had a thread about doing some magic to ensure that the November Presidential erections are “fair and honest.” This is my response:

This is an interesting idea, however I have some
meta-concerns about it. Put simply: I believe a fair and
honest election is impossible at this juncture.

“Tweedle Dumb or Tweedle Dumber” — or more accurately,
“Tweedle Neurotic Servant Of Corporate Greed or Tweedle
Sociopathic Servant Of Corporate Greed” — is hardly
fair, no matter how votes are counted, no matter how
many people with brown skin are disenfranchised, no
matter how many Supreme Court justices decide who should
be president.

The two party system is nothing but a smokescreen, a way
to placate the American people into believing that their
vote is somehow meaningful. “I live in America, where
I’m free to choose Coke OR Pepsi!” I’m here to say: cola
sucks, rots your teeth, and has no nutritional value
whatsoever. They may as well return to putting cocaine
into it.

As far as honesty goes, who knows. I myself am
suspicious that Florida 2000 is the first example of
election rigging. It’s just the first one that was close
enough that everyone paid attention.

Don’t mean to be overly pessimistic here, but this
system is broken. If we are going to do magic to
improve the American political situation, the we should
start at the base and fix the problem, not merely pull
the wool back over people’s eyes into thinking that
votes between a Rep and a Dem will make any substantial

This system is broken, and needs to be replaced.

I actually laughed out loud a few times when I wrote this. I particularly liked the “neurotic servant of corporate greed” vs “sociopathic servant of corporate greed” line.

Leave a Reply